Dear Journal,

How are you feeling? As for me, I’m fine. Today is going well. Yesterday did not go well for me at all, but then again it depends on how you look at it. OK, so let me tell this story. Originally, when I asked the girl out, I wanted to go hiking, so I told her so. She seemed excited about the idea of going out, but not so excited about going hiking specifically. She originally said, “I don’t like hiking !” but then after I said it’s not a hike, it’s more of a nature walk. She smiled and said “Ok, I can use the exercise.”

So I had my mind all set on this romantic hike. I went to test it out myself yesterday just to see if it would really make a good date. I chose Malibu. The reason is because the few times that I have been on the trial, the views I had found were really beautiful. The beach is right there as well and it is nice to view the beach from high in the mountains.

But…after experimenting yesterday, I can clearly see that taking a girl on a hike for the first date is a horrible idea. I was on the trail. When I got there, I imagined how nice it would be to bring dinner and wine and just eat it in all of this nature. In fact, while I was walking on the trial, I stumbled upon a couple that was doing that very thing. They were laying on a blanket together and just talking and eating snacks.

Anyways, just to get to the views, I walked up steep hills and rough bushes. I was sweating. 20 minutes in, and I felt like this would not be a good date at all. I went to the beach after, it was beautiful and all, but it was cold. There was just nothing else that I knew about the area as well. Just think, if she would have been with me, that would have been a horrible date. She is out of town, now. I will invite her somewhere different when I get back. I’m just going to take her to the local barcade. It is a nice place that I had been to before that just has beer, music, and a bunch of arcade games. She is a fun loving girl, and she told me that she likes video games, so that should work out.

It was rough for me to get up to Malibu, yesterday and it was a lot rough for me to get back as well. It was freezing cold. I started to get sad and doubt myself about many things after. I can’t believe I had invited her to that, I though. Now she knows that I am clueless about dating and am just the average guy that she is tired of. I can’t believe that I had told her what I had told her on top of that. I told her that I was sexually attracted to her and that I liked her. Thinking about it now, it still may not have been too bad that I had told her that, but while thinking about it on top of all the mess, yesterday, I felt really stupid and lame for saying it.

I have been thinking about her A LOT and praying and hoping that whatever we do, we have a really great time and that…we have sex. Sex with her specifically has been on my mind specifically with her. She is too sexy to me, that’s why. But I feel trashy just thinking like

We absolutely have to have sex !

as the primary purpose for getting her out. But she specifically told me that she is a freak, so…maybe there is nothing wrong with it. I will not have to work that hard to get some. She more than likely probably wants to have sex with me just as bad. There is no wrong I can do. I want to do so much to her. I want to lick each and every one of her toes. I want to suck on her breast for a really long time. I want to eat her out for a really long time. I’m getting an erection just by typing this stuff in. I do not feel like a creep about it. Nothing I have done has been wrong so far. She’s waiting for me(starting to think positive)

Yeah, so this is the girl I really like. I am not as excited about going out with the other girl, but I will make sure we have fun as well. I just haven’t been thinking about her much because of this girl. I really like this girl. I know that things will work out for the best of us.

That’s all for now.

Take care !



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