Dear Journal,

How are you feeling? As for me, I am fine but am still in some type of frustration or regret. I should have done better. I was thinking the following things:

Oh, she doesn’t want to be seen alone in this crazy, dangerous, part of town. So she sat close next to me to make it seem like she had a guy with her to protect her

She’s just sitting next to me like that because, well…it’s a seat.

She just smiled and blushed like that to be polite.

Now she’s asking for a specific bus because….oh, she’s lost

All of which are false. I know that that was her way of letting me know that she was checking me out and wanted me to approach. I’m tired of not capitalizing on opportunities like this. I’ve been writing about stuff like this for two years. Have I improved? Well, I will give myself credit for not needing alcohol anymore. I haven’t drank in two months and I am very comfortable with doing photos and talking to girls without drinking. I will do better with being aggressive and assertive. That is the main thing that I need to work on.I’m sure I will get better. 

Other than that, essential oils have been keeping me satisfied. My rosehip oil has just been shipped to me. I made a lotion out of geranium, frankincense, lavendar, rosehip, and coconut oils. All of this is like a good skin, anti-aging solution. I know girls don’t care about a handsome face all that much. I am mostly doing this for me. Essential oils, in general, adds a whole other level of things to my life, though. They are just good to have. Simply inhaling them puts me in a cloud 9 mood. I usually carry peppermint oil and lemon oil in my pocket. I inhale those especially in smelly downtown LA. 

Anyways, I wrote enough . I will not check for typos. 

Take care ! 


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