04/15/17

Dear Journal,

How are you feeling? As for me, I’m fine. I’m just here enjoying the weekend. I skipped getting up early to go to Krav Maga class. That’s OK. I need rest and I am avoiding burn out. I admit that it is not easy going from place to place on the bus. But it is adventurous and healthy, and it saves me a lot of money. A bus ride to Krav Maga would have required me to get up at 6am and take a two hour bus ride carrying a bag full of sparring equipment. I have been going to class, consistently like that. I shouldn’t feel that bad about breaks.

So I am just here enjoying the weekend. I’m doing whatever I want. Soon, I will clean up a bit, do some exercise and go Grocery shopping. I know that if I waited too long to exercise, I would not want to. Speaking of exercise, my efforts are totally paying off. I’m sure I look like I work out, but no one comments on my body so much. I sort of got a compliment from my coworker yesterday:

Her: Do you lift weights?
Me: No
Her: Then how are you arms?…I don’t know…you look like you lift weights.
Me: I just do a lot of push ups and pull ups

She randomly asked me that. So there, I have judgement besides my own that my body is looking good. Speaking of her, like I said, I can probably date her, but I just don’t because she is a coworker. Not only that, but I just don’t trust her. She is just someone that I would have sex with, primarily because her boobs are huge. Other than that, I don’t think she would be worth any effort. She lacks a lot.

She’s slightly overweight, and she doesn’t have the discipline to eat healthy. She’s seems to be a bit spoiled by her grandmother, who raised her. She can’t cook, and seems like she would be too lazy to do the dishes after cooking. She looks like she would just be a slouch. It’s like she used to not having to put any effort toward anything. She’s young. Perhaps, she’s teachable, but I don’t have the patience to teach. She’s just not worth my effort. She also told me that her and a few other coworkers were planning on going to a bar, after work and that she wanted me to come. It sounded OK, but I didn’t care to go. Vietnam is my priority, first of all. I want to save money by not going out and spending money on alcohol. I’m not going to deviate. So I stuck to my plans of coming home and relaxing to video games and such.

I do wonder if she likes me. She’s constantly in my face about something at work. One time, I walked around with headphones on. In the middle of that day, she smiled and told me that she really wants to know what I listen to. She wants to know my interest. I took one day off, and she told me that she missed me. I saw her starring at me–checking me out, I think to the point where it made me sort of uncomfortable and I shyly shrugged and asked “What?” She just shacked her head as if to say nothing.

But hey, I’m just assuming there, anyways.

We had a Barbecue for Good Friday. I would write about how annoying my supervisor was, but I don’t know how. Fuck it, let’s try. I just wanted to enjoy setting up and cooking and having fun and all. I was quiet and just doing whatever. She was walking around, confused looking, and watching me, and trying to stop and talk about a million and one plans. Everything was a fucking suggestion that didn’t matter. I totally wished she would just shut the fuck up. It’s annoying to talk to her, in general. I try to avoid asking her questions. If I ask her a question about one thing, it would turn into a thirty minute conversation about future plans and other unrelated topics. I think she is very non focused–all over the place. She is not confident, honest, and she is an emotional wreck. I could tell that she knew I was annoyed, yesterday. After I quickly answered one of her annoying questions, yesterday, she randomly said:

I feel like you have been jumping down my throat all day.

What the fuck, bitch!? I am struggling not to say a word. She was the one with all the suggestions and comments that I have been fighting to avoid.

It’s like I said. She’s from the same planet as my mom, and I feel the same “ewww..what Kryptonite” feel. I just stay away the best way that I can.

I will make it a goal to start applying for jobs in Vietnam in May. I will not have my TEFL certificate by then, but hey, it’s still worth a start. Maybe I will find something that will take care of all things that I would need to take care of on my own if I were to just fly there and start looking for jobs.

Anyways, I feel like I have wrote about enough.

Take Care !

music I wrote this to:

P1030355.jpg

 

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