Dear Journal,

How are you feeling? As for me, I’m fine. Today went by well, I guess. Actually, ever since I got back from Vietnam, I’ve been angry. I’ve been angry because I want to go back. I’ve been angry because I compare the people I saw and the personalities and such to the people and things that I see here. I think the culture there is better than ours. I don’t know. I just want to go back.

I have been studying for TEFL for about 3 hours a week. That’s enough to get 120 hours in before June. Here, I have been doing absolutely nothing. No drinking, no going out, no partying. I’m not giving up on that area of my life of course. I just need to get to Vietnam, and I want no obstacles. I need to save as much as possible. Hopefully, I will be ready before June. Before June sounds so good. I can’t wait to move.

I fantasize or visualize a lot about how my lifestyle will be like there. I will drink coconut juice every morning. I will be the best English teacher that I can be in the day and I will do really sexy photoshoots in the night.

Speaking of photoshoots. I am currently reading a really good book about photography. It just talks about the art of photography and it gives me different artist to look up and different things to reflect on.  I actually watched a really good movie this weekend about a serial killer that was a photographer. The movie is called “Peeping Tom.”

This book will make me become a better photographer.

Other than just staying at home and studying and such, I have been working out and still doing insanity and Krav Maga. Since I am home a lot these days, I have been playing video games on my PC from time to time too. I really love games like “Modern Combat 5 and “Asphalt. 8 Airborne” That race car game is just too great. I love to turn my speakers up loud and play. I can’t believe it’s free !

I almost thought of giving up on going to the meditation center. I was so disappointed about everything when I realized I still have an anger problem. I thought of just giving my own meditation–the one I used to do based off a book I have a try again. But I will not give up. The meditation center has been good for me. I will read more of the literature. But when I get to Vietnam, I may have to rely on the one I used to do for a while. The only major difference between the two is one is closed eye–the one I do at home. The meditation center uses an open eye technique. Either way, I think meditation, overall, has been good for me.

Anyways, that’s all I will write about for now. I will look up how I felt this day last year.

Take Care !



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