07/23/16

Dear Journal,

How are you feeling? As for me, I’m OK. I have just been moody these past two days. But only about work matters. I don’t like my job anymore, and this new boss that I have is not on the same page with me, and that’s probably why I don’t like my job anymore. I knew this person from somewhere before(work related), and I didn’t like her back then. Some people, just based off their energy, just causes me to go “yuck”, and she’s one of them.

So, I am making a new resume, and I will start looking for something new. Maybe I will go back to doing my real job. But I have been laid off so many times from doing it that I am afraid to go back.

I’ve been nostalgic, lately. I used to shoot with this red head girl, a lot. She was very tall, and she had this big beautiful full lips. She had really long and natural red hair. We did so many photos, together. She loved shooting with me. I was looking through old photos of mine, and I saw hers. I took a glance at the old photos and it made me think of her a lot. I caved in and sent her a message saying, “Hi”, but she didn’t respond, yet.

The girl I met at the bus stop suddenly quit texting me. That’s expected. You win some, you lose some. I still don’t think I have time for a steady date. I don’t think I have the money for a steady date.

I was out yesterday, after work, and experimenting with barbie. I was doing photoshoots with the doll, outside. I was still feeling pretty down, so I wasn’t in the mood to flirt with anyone, I don’t think. Or maybe it was my shyness that caused me to just walk pass the girl that kept looking my way and smiling at a stairway we were at. I was wrapping things up and getting ready to leave. She came near me and sat on the staircase and started smoking a cigarette. She seemed friendly.

I just took a break to go and do some work, right, now. I noticed, like I said above, that my mood has been…I’ve been depressed. I noticed myself staring off into space with my arms folded and being ready to cry and having all the bad thoughts that I used to have years ago. I’m not sure what’s the cause. It can be my diet. I haven’t been able to follow the diet plans lately. I’m almost sure it’s that. So I will jump back on it and see how my mood changes.

Take Care

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