04/27/16

Dear Journal,

How are you feeling? As for me, I’m fine. I’ve been meeting goals and such. I decided to skip Krav Maga class yesterday so I can kind of get out of routine, you know. I stayed home and watched a movie I had heard about. It’s called “Cinderella Man.” I thought it was pretty boring. I still worked out in the park on my own, and I will definitely go to class this Thursday.

Speaking of Thursday. A girl wanted me to shoot her birthday party, but I can’t make it because of work. She will be Djing there. She was sort of a friend of mine. For some reason, she deleted and blocked me on facebook a while ago, and I haven’t seen nor heard from her since. Not until recently. She resurfaced as a working DJ. I used to talk to her and encourage her pursuit in music all the time. She really liked that. I can tell that she liked me a bit…maybe a lot. I can tell she’s disappointed that I can’t make it to her party. I’m sure we’ll do our thing together soon, though.

I’ve been taking selfies in the mirror. I’m just curious about or admiring my abs that I’ve developed for myself. I like how my body is coming along. For some reason, I still question rather I look fat or not.

I’ve been having minor insecurities about my position in life. But not really heavy on it. I’m improving and getting better. Things are bright and they are looking bright.

I’ve been taking Ginseng, lately. That stuff feels better than Rhodiola ! It gives me tons of energy and good moods.

For some reason, I’ve been asking past girls if they want to shoot with me again, but the minute they say “yes”, I change my mind. I still, really, don’t want to do anything with girls until I have read that dating book 10 times. I also want to meet new girls instead of shooting the old ones again.

Well, that’s …oh wait !

I didn’t tell you that I finally bought a ticket to Hawaii so that I can visit my best friend. he’s been asking me for years. But my life and finances were so mismanaged back then that I could never come. Back in those years, I was sad, depressed, confused, suicidal,  and angry. Every penny I had went to food and prostitutes, mostly, and occasional dates.I’m so much better now. I can manage enough to travel. After Hawaii, I plan on going to Chicago again. I will make a few minor trips to places like Vegas and Florida. Then I will definitely fly to Russia to explore some things. That may be the bravest thing I do

Take care !

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