11/26/15

Dear Journal,

How are you feeling? As for me, I’m fine. Yesterday went by well. I’m doing my best. I went to the museum with my mom and my nephew. I enjoyed the museum, and I need to go back, alone. If I were a tourist here, alone though, I would not go to Chicago History Museum. Or maybe I would. It is sort of interesting. I wonder how much it cost. My mom got free passes because they give free passes out to Illinois residents.  Asking her how much the ticket cost will be a task in itself because she can’t seem to have a conversation or talk about anything or go about her day without being agitated or getting an attitude. Her and I are definitely on two very very opposite ends of the worlds. They most irritating thing I saw her do yesterday, among many: Cars would put their signal on very much ahead of time because they needed to get in her lane; she rush forward and fight and fight and fight, fighting never to let the driver get into her lane. That’s ridiculous ! I almost said, “So you don’t want to let him over?” But I didn’t want to hear her irritating and annoying voice. Her constant nagging and bitching about something all day long is equivalent to having to hear a fucking police siren in your ear all God damned day !

OK, well, so now good things about my mom so I don’t focus so much on the negative. She loves/likes her kids. She buys many things for her grand kids. She has worked the same job for over 20 years, I think. She enjoys her life in her own way. That’s all I can say.

I don’t like my mom. It may sound cold or maybe it does not sound cold, but it’s reality at this moment.

I was very happy to see my nephew yesterday, though. He’s 15. He spoiled and maybe shy. Overall, I hope things go very very well for him. I don’t like the way my sister yells at him. As far as parenting goes, she’s like my mom was or maybe worst. I was excited and  asked a lot of question about him. hope I see him, today for Thanksgiving.

I saw my brother, yesterday as well. He seems good and happy and is just working and taking care of his family and kids.

After the museum, we came home. That was it. We came home. I stayed on the computer and did a few things. The girl I was talking to online confirmed that she would not be meeting with me. I looked for more girls. At this point, it’s definitely up to street recruiting. I read some parts of the Bible, I played Chess, and I watched a movie called gremlins. We did stop at some local small grocery shops on the way home. At one of the ones my mom parked at, I noticed an interesting looking African shop, so I stopped in

I really loved the store. I loved the smell of it with all of it’s raw and natural products(food, soap, etc.) I had a great time checking out the store. Until my mom knew I was there and walked in behind me. I couldn’t even have damn conversation with the guy about what country he was from, etc. She irritating questioned every fucking thing ! Jesus…anyway I fought through her bad energy and bought some cologne and soap. It was a very huge block of natural soap that was made in Africa, and I can’t wait to use it. We have a community in Los Angeles called “Little Ethiopia.” I’m sure they have many stores like the one I had seen, yesterday, and I can’t wait to check them out when I get back.

Money spending wise. I think I’m doing fine. I don’t go to restaurants here all the time a lot of times I just eat at home–mostly tomatoes and avocados that I bought on my own and a bit of mom’s food. I got coffee and donuts from somewhere about two times–5 bucks each. The rest of my money went to bus fair. I paid the fee for my Krav Maga classes back home. I have $562 left. So where does my money go?

I have a planned shoot when I get back. Based off the type of shoot it will be, she’s being paid so, $150.00 goes to the girl. $55 for the hotel room. That leaves me with $357.00 how strict should I be? OK. $200.00 of that goes into emergency fund savings and $157 is mine to spend. Oh wait. $50 goes to grocery food when I get back home, so $100 is mine to spend on whatever. I guess that’s fair enough. Is the money that’s going to the girl a waste? But how am I going to practice the kind of shoots I like to do? Life is about giving and receiving, you know. She  thinks she has the looks and the body to make it into the modeling industry and get paid for it. By paying for her, I’m telling her that I like her look, she deserves to be paid. Karma has it that someone will do the same for me in the future. It’s not a waste of money. It’s an investment. I don’t pay a lot of girls.

Ever since I did a photoshoot with that one girl in this hotel in a town called “Little Tokyo”. in LA, I thought it would be a good idea to keep doing those type of shoots in that hotel. So I am working on a series doing that. Who knows I may make it into a book.

So today, I’m going to meditate for 10 minutes and be very focused on my breath. I really will be focused. I’ll make it the best I ever did before mom wakes up. I’m going to shower using that new African soap I have. I will be very mentally tolerable of my mom. I’m going to have an awesome Thanksgiving and have great talks with family members. When we get back home, I’m going to read “Money Masters”, a section of The Bible, and whatever else I have the time and energy to read. I’m going to…work on Stylelife Challenge as well and meet a girl online.

Anyways, take care Journal.

10310004

 

 

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