How are you feeling? As for me, I’m fine. I can’t sleep, though. I slept after last night’s pool party, and I didn’t go to the other party afterwords. I’m sure it was fun, but hey, there will always be other parties. Last night’s pool party was great. I enjoyed being on the dance floor. I guess it was because I really enjoyed the music, but also because I felt like it was the place where I can socialize with people better. My friend, who invited me was there. She’s a bit weird, and I’m actually crossing her off as a friend. She asked me to come and told me that she’d get me on the guest list, but I found out that she doesn’t work with the people who through the party and is just a guest herself. Why didn’t she just flat out ask me to come. I ended up paying $20 dollars to get in. No big deal; I’m here to enjoy myself. I saw a few people I knew there. I failed big time, once again, at actually approaching girls. I recognize that I’m too nervous and worried about nothing. I also think about my intentions, like what do I want from her if i approach, but I know I shouldn’t be thinking that far into it. Thoughts like that are just an excuse. I really did want to find a girl to create art work with, though.
Though, I never approached anyone, there was one, maybe two beautiful girls who approached me, I guess. The one standing in line next to me at the bar was friendly, and only started a conversation with me about the beer I ordered. It had a funny name. She was a little cute. I thought that I can do better, though. The second girl talked to me on the dance floor. I saw her watching me a bit before she came and said something. When that girl who invited me showed up and we started talking, she interrupted us and told me that she knew me from somewhere and asked my name and such. I just talked to her like normal. I think her boyfriend was there as well. We were just friendly to each other throughout the whole event. That’s all that happened–no number getting or doing anything further.
I really do not like the girl who invited me. I know I’m not being shallow, but she’s just not my thing. Outside of her horrid looks and bad breath, she’s very ignorant and has something bad to say about someone all the time. She’s drama filled. She’s…yuck ! I will not look at my decision to take the time to get to know her as time wasted; I’ll just look at it as time invested and I conclude that I’ll just pull out. I’ll never hang around her, again.
I’m going to another pool party, today. I will not be afraid to approach whatsoever ! I am fed up with myself. We will see how this goes. Catch you later. I will try and sleep again.
Kiss me hard before you go
I just wanted you to know
That, baby, you’re the best